Friday, August 17, 2007

Letting Go

Just like this one, my nest will soon be empty. I was told that this is a hummingbird's nest, and finding one is supposed to be magical. I don't know if that's true, but it is amazing to see this wee little nest - it's less than two inches across and looks like spun cotton. When I found it, I held it gently in the palm of my hand so that I wouldn't crush it - kind of like the first time I held my son. Not in the palm of my hand, silly, but gently so I wouldn't harm him. The nest is now living in a plant in my kitchen. I wish you could see it in person. My photo really doesn't do it justice.

Tomorrow Matt will load up a truck and move to Washington, DC. All week I've been journaling about "letting go," but it doesn't matter how much I pour my heart out onto the pages, he's still going to go and I'm still going to miss the heck out of him. I want him to go - really! :D It's time for him to leave the comfort of home and spread his wings. Only then will he appreciate how good he had it! just kidding! (sort of)

I've been luckier than a lot of moms. Most kids don't go to college 15 miles away, so their moms have to get used to doing without them 4 years earlier. Being right up the road didn't mean that he came home every weekend, but it did mean that he could pop in whenever he felt like it, (usually when he wanted something to eat). I, however, could NOT pop in on him whenever I felt like it! I had to be extra careful about not invading his space! I do a lot of my shopping in Chapel Hill - groceries and other things - and if I happened to see Matt walking down the street, I could not roll the window down, wave wildly, and yell, "Yoohoo! Maaatt!" No, the rules that went into place around sixth or seventh grade still apply - no public sign of recognition. And definitely no public display of affection!

This is Randy & Matt - note that there is food and wine involved! Hmmm, seems typical for us....

The first time he was away from us for any period, he spent a semester in France. That was a looooong 5 months. It didn't help that there was an ocean between us. I obsessed that he would NEED me and that I would not be able to get there fast enough. But I think we probably talked to him more during that time than during the rest of his college life. Because we used Skype through our computer, we had a set time for him to call us each week. No other time has he called us weekly, but probably at no other time has he had so much exciting stuff to tell us either. What he doesn't realize is that it's ALL exciting to us - I want to hear about every little thing, no matter how mundane he may think it is. "Oh? You rode your bike 6 miles today. You bought a new T-shirt? What color is it?" I want it all, all the details of his life... So, as he goes off into the world, this young man of mine, I hope that he will call me often and fill me in on ALL the details of his new life.

From this

To this

...blink of an eye...

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